Love

Miriam’s Death

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Someone recently drew a picture of me
When queried, another claimed it looked like Moses
With this I thought, Moshe Rabbeinu
The one to teach and lead the way
The bridge between us and what’s above
Wandering the wilderness to build
A people worthy of the land
But not without its strife
For he lost his Miriam
And saw only the vision of what’s to be
From afar beside the river Jordan

Have I reached the valley’s depth
I’m not sure I can take anymore
I have been left, dumbed and inept
I am lost in the wilderness
There is no road in sight
To the left or the right
I have tumbled, stumbled and fumbled
With every good thing, WHERE IS MY FIGHT
That which will release me of this blight

Or am I to end up as Avihu and Nadav
With these unforgivable mistakes
Will I be left with death in the desert Negev
Bent to the ground to slither with the snakes

Please may I be given the strength to keep this evil at bay
Something to keep it together all along the way

Miriam’s dead to me
I’ve been in the desert
For so long
Will I reach my land
Will I drink the milk
Will I eat the honey
Am I destined to live
Or will I die
Having only seen from afar
That which I’ve been living for

You really were the backbone
For a people all alone
You were the support
For the one that lead the charge
Without you the well’s run dry
Left in our mouths the taste of bitterness
Leaving a patch of Eden behind
It’s just enough to quench this thirst

You were the support for the boy
Who wanted only to love and care
For the one who would be there
Through the highs and lows

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Miriam’s Death

Two Lies

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I’ve lost two things that meant most to me
I’ve lost that which kept me smiling bright

Oh G-d, I’ve lost my back
Lost the bone that kept
Me up and so straight
All that’s in my head
All these things I feel
It’s too hard to belate

Oh Love, I’ve lost my mind
Lost the dream that kept
Me and mine alright
Keeping me afloat
Soaring lonely skies
Without a bit of fright

I’ve kept these lies from being mine
Broken what bolsters this rind
Keeping from me these truths
Accepting all that sooths

‘Cause these are the two lies
Of that which pries out our eyes
Infecting our blood with lye
Away from the truth, we shall all shy

These are the two lies
That have kept me breathing
These are the two lies
That have kept me dreaming

Two Lies

What To Do

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What’s there to do
With your father’s possible suicide
And all you can think about
Is the worst night of your life
And that you haven’t dealt at all
With the regrets you’ve kept inside

You’ve given up on yourself
Over this one big mistake
Oh it was so long ago
Why can’t you just let this go

Coming awake to the cityscape
From behind the wheel, your mouth agape
The memories that precede, left to escape
Sobs bundled in tears barely taking shape

It all comes falling down
It comes tumbling to the ground
Then you can’t pick up the pieces
Juggling it ’til life ceases

But you can take solace in this
Your dad’s still got his best friend
The drugs he’s kept so near and dear
Just to drive away the fear
And he still has his girls
Bent to his will at the drop of a bill

Then there’s the girl
You’d always kiss her in the middle of her sentences
With so much effort you peppered her with sweetnesses
Afraid that her next words would lead her astray
From your path you always knew she wouldn’t stay
And then she was gone

You’ve given up your best friend
To this modern modesty
You’ve lost your spine
That which kept you an honest you

What’s there to do
When all that’s left of the best
Are these rogue strands of hair
Pirating from the high seas of the past
Entangling this in knots
Keeping the treasure locked inside
Where you can still smell
The sweat laced nights
Fighting beneath the sheets we’d swell
Forever marked by her playful bites
Oh what is this hell?!

What To Do

For This, By The Sea

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These are the moments
To which I’d like to return
To cycle back
And revisit in turn
These I will tally
While sailing the sea
On my mind’s galley
I’ll dally away the day

At the shore of this Galilean sea
Your heart you opened to me
That Shabbat in the park
You gifted me your touch
It swept from my mind anything dark
To these memories ever I clutch
On the bus you shared with me your smile
This I’ve thought back on all the while

Years later and we’re talking again
Please let us connect and allow me to stay within
Your head is where I’d like to reside
To live out my days inside

You may not believe all this that I haven’t said
I’m stuck with that which I’ve made, my bed
Well I’d love for you to hear and see
All of this that is really me

I’ll skirt my way around it in rhyme
So you just might see the point in time
I’ve rallied behind this sally
To leave this folly dead in the alley
From this volley I’ll gladly
Carry you through the valley

For This, By The Sea

It Takes Two, A Song

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(Intro)
Let the piano play its riffed hook
Then bring in the Bass to thump the backend
And let this be for a measure or two
Before the guitar wails its intro trying to mend
Us of the blues that afflicts and to our core has shook
Our spines that have bent and left to rend
From our hearts everything from even the smallest nook
Overextending this apprehension for a lady friend

(Verse Lyrics)
All these girls I sing about
You’d like to think I’ve had them
Just the way I wish I had
Because you wish you did
You use my words to
Keep you from you
And your own past regrets
Whisk them away, I say let’s
Write a new song
A better one
Where I’ve had what’s mine
With a sip of chilled wine
And you don’t need me
Or my words to get you by

(Pre-Chorus)
Let the band fall and rise
To arpeggiate its way into your soul
In a way to ready you for what’s to come
The only part you’ll remember

(Chorus Lyrics)
If I could sing
Then I’d sing it to you
If I could speak
I’d SCREAM it out loud

If only I could
Oh well, what would it matter

It takes two to, you know
It takes two to do what we do

(Bridge)
We’ll give you eight bars to relate
The former and latter of what you’ve heard
Just to manufacture this state
Of fluttering among the wind as a bird
Around the theme we circumnavigate
To give the hope of an ending preferred
To gain the mate we’ll revert and negate
What’s left unheard word for word

(Verse Lyrics)
I see you sittin’ there
And you’re all alone
Reveling in it with a smile
I’m left but to bemoan
It’s in your eyes like mine
That’s there’s more in this, to be sown
If the words would just leave
But they’ll stay to remain my own

(Pre-Chorus, Chorus)
So we return to the familiar
To deliver a somewhat linear
Bigger figure to leave you with a shiver
Yet filter what’s in the mirror
With a whisper to embitter the winter
And a trigger to the inferior

(Outro)
Then we strip away to reveal
The hidden ostinato
That’s been an undertone throughout
With words in a way to appeal
To the few you’ll retain
And think of in the rain

(Spoken)
It takes two to (chuckles) well you know
It takes two to do what we do (sighs)

It Takes Two, A Song

The Beastly Beauty, This Beautiful Beast

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You’re the beauty
Always dancing through my mind
Shining brightly
Blinding these binding tidings of peace

You’re the beast
Manipulating your clause
The one I like the least
Let’s bring everyone to the cause
Your path has carved east
Let’s do this right, show me your claws!

You’re the beauty and the beast
Always dancing around the fact
Waiting for the great feast
Never willing to act

But you’re chasing these fantasies
Believing their lies
Throwing out your alliances
Ever changing your appearances
Relying on their ever building
Tower upon your weak self-conscious
It’s waiting to crumble
And see you tumble
I anticipate apologies
From out of your mouth to fumble

But for one day, someday
We’ll find this rose someway
Or we’ll find what’s left
Not yet expressed from my chest
Plucked forth per pedal
In protest of my mettle
Against this futile plea for ‘we’
To somehow simply live and be

And still you’re dancing
Still I’m left glancing
Through this entrancing
Window to the past

The Beastly Beauty, This Beautiful Beast

Thoroughly Modern Miri

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TMM

You may have changed your name a couple of times
But you’re still the same
So thoroughly modern
Trying to live this archaic archetype
The Arch-Duke of this sickly fleeting life
This so thoroughly modern diligence
You wear so heavily as a mask
It’s wearing on you
Starting to shine through
As though it ever has
My sentenced lack of sense set to ever last
Here we are with your hand in his
Any other way it would be in mine
But why this self-determination
This preservation of reservations abound
My alacrity stifled down to its minimalest
By blood boiling from animal instincts
Ready to charge the attack
Gums spiked with glass
Forming knives in the backs
Of all who appeal your dealings with me
Yet again thinking, only of me
And my self righteous rights
Of my written spitten spite
For all that has, is, and will come to pass
I’ll leave you here to never come back
To leave me free to be at last
For you, I’m done, and for all that I lack.

Thoroughly Modern Miri

Kiss Her Well

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She arrived with a look in her eye
That said she was ready for the night
The jade draping leaving little to hide
And I’m dying to be by her side

Her hair done up in a bun for none
But her own hidden mission she’s spun
Unshunned, the hearts of all, she has won
Oh, and I’m dying to be her sun

In this so high am I flying
Trapped in your gaze it’s mesmerizing
The glide in your stride is hypnotizing
From my way you’ve got me swaying
For a way in I’m praying
You’ll not be waylaying
My inept attempt at conversating
I’ve been dying for this kind of connecting

The bell
It’s time to get out of this shell
The sell
To her all of this I will tell
The belle
Oh isn’t she swell
Her smell
Caught on my lapel
This hell
To which I’ll say farewell
The quell

The time for action
To gain her attraction
And heated reaction

The guiding voice to yell:
“The mademoiselle,
Kiss her well!”

Kiss Her Well

Always

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Always all the right

In all the wrong places

And to too great an extent

It’s always the:

What we could be

What you could be

What I could be

She’s always exactly:

One half:

Everything I could possibly want

-Though I have NO idea what that is

One half:

Everything I don’t need

-Be it crazy or insecure or an attention seeker

I’m always exactly:

One half:

Hopelessly romantic

One half:

Fucking crazy

It’s always the smile. I’m a sucker for a girl in need that laughs at my jokes and has a beautiful smile. It’s always a smile so memorable that it haunts you long after it’s gone. Sometimes it’s the teeth, shown wide and proud. Sometimes it’s the guttural, from the heart, laugh that cannot be contained. Sometimes it’s the dimples and nose wrinkles. Sometimes it’s the accompanying eyes that pull me away in a way to say:

“It’s only me and you right now, in this gaze. And you, you alone, put this smile on my face, this joy in my heart.”

Always

Always The Same

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I need to rid myself of this
She’s always the same
Always in need of something I think I have to give
All this energy I’ve expended
Always for the sake of someone else

And this new one
She’s just a variation on the same old theme
It’s like some conspiracy
They’ve all banded together for this scheme
Like they feed from my despondency

I’m so tired of always being your rock
You’re beautiful and you just can’t see it
You could be so wonderful
If you’d just let yourself be it
This life you lead could be so blissful

So you just keep that smile on your face
And know that I’ll find mine someday
“You’re the only one who allows me to be me”
Was something you once said
I could be wrong but maybe that was me

Here I am playing the same role
In this neverending play
The protaganist, to become whole
For his love, he must slay
All around and within
As in the end, a tragedy
Or to break free of all that is him
To accept all that should be

Or would or could, these are just words
So just laugh it off, this happy ending
Because one day you’ll see the smiles on their faces
All the props and pawns in their places
In a portrait of where we all could be
Like the end of some old comedy

Always The Same